decided to delete my previous post...

i cant cry out... i had cooled down after my outrage...

for some ridiculous reasons... i actually felt very sad... i know i shldn't... but i m feeling sad...

after looking at the photos we took over the past 3 n half years... i realised that i do love him.. with all my heart... but i cannot forgive him for cheating on me... i cant forgive and forget... but i still love him... and realli tried very hard to make it work.. but... that video in his hp was the last straw...

i was silly... i shld have left him 2 years ago... but i din.. i wan to believe that he realli will change... and that ultimately... i m the one he loves.... no matter what other pple say how bad he is... i still stick with him... coz i love him.. haiz..

he was a good bf.. took care of my needs and wants in everyway possible... really... all the way to monetaries term... but... still.. just that he cheated on me... that overturns all the goods he done... does he realli loves me?? i m beginning to doubt... maybe becoz i cannot forget that he two-timed me... for countless times...

i realised that i need a man who can stay faithful to me... i need a man i can completely trust... i need a man who would not hurt me in anyway...

not a man who cheated on me.. and lied to me in so many ways... not a man who mis-used my trust to fool ard...

i know i have to start keeping the memories i had with him behind me... i know he will not be there when i need him anymore.. i know i m on my own already... its juz that.. i had forgotten now to be independent after a almost 4 years relationship... i will be fine.. i have to be fine and move on...

i will pick up myself after this fall... i m hurt... but i will nurse my own wounds...

wish you well no matter wad... i will not contact u anymore... i will try to erase u frm my memories... bye...