being putting some tots into this particular thing called "LOVE".

What is LOVE?

Love
–noun
1. a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.
2. a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.
3. sexual passion or desire.
4. a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart.

so the question still lies.. What is LOVE?

a guy/girl says i love you to another girl/guy... so what is love? love is a feeling which no one can realli describe.. OR.. its juz a presence of that particular person that u have grown so use to over the time...

so the question realli still lies... What is LOVE?

=)

dear came over to send mi to work juz now... happy... but that oso means he haven slp yet.. sad sad..

finished harry potter.. haiz.. even harry din die.. there are still too many deaths.. haiz...

sometimes i wonder and dream.. wad is it like to be actually able to perform magic.. magic.. hmm.. something so mystical.. so soo.. sooo... hmm.. no other words to describe le..

JK Rowling's world of magic is juz something that everyone (i believed) will look forward to.. =)

heavy rain... very heavy rain....

Still in office.. boring.. tired.. slpy...

gonna have to skip work tml.. coz dear going to acc mi to pay a visit to the dentist.. lets see.. how many years i've not visited one..

*count*
1,2,3,4.... (lost count)

hmm.. honestly speaking.. lost interest in work.. damn routine.. haiz...

been to a classical music concert at victoria concert hall last sat.. dear's fren.. andrew's concert.. he was the conductor n played oboe for a couple of number.. not bad.. but abit dull on the choice of songs though.. hhaa.. oh well... i guess i have not been in touch with the "musical" side of mi for a very long time..

deeply engaged in my copy of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallow... usual mi will take juz one day to finished read... coz i will coup myself up in my room.. n read.. read.. read... but the mi today.. had already took 4 days.. and still yet to complete the book.. *angry*

hmm.. reason? been working and going out alot.. not that i m complaining or wad.. juz explaining out myself.. coz i realli can finished in one day de... haiz..

n dear had been silly by kept asking mi if harry died yet.. or blah blah blah.. he even attempted to read the last chapter 1st.. O.O!!! no!!! cannot ok.. *bleah* =p

juz gimmi one more day.. i swear i will finish the whole book... i will!!!

writing in in a freezer.. (if u know wad i mean) brrrrgggg....

think i'm gonna fall sick soon.. haiz.. been having a spliting headache n backache since i woke up at 7am to do my laundry... n the freezing environment in my office is not helping mi at all...

keep having this tendency to lose focus when facing the computer... been this way for the past few weeks.. i seriously think my astigmatism is getting worse.. (used to b juz 50 degrees on both eyes) told dear i need to get a pair of glass juz for that.. coz when i drive oso like that.. scarly one day u read newspaper with the headline of car crash due to astigmatism.. that would most likely b mi.. =p...

checked letterbox this morning.. no check.. zzzz...

harry potter's out tml!!! yipeee... the very much long awaited/ anticipated/ last/ popular book is out!! sounds too kwah zhang? haha.. coz i waited too long le.. happy...

dear prepared dinner last nite.. haha.. lamp chop.. nice.. thanx dear.. cook somemore for mi n ur family k.. lol.. the most i help u to wash up loh...

right nw kinda no mood to work sia.. sitting dwn juz makes my back aches real bad... kept taking short breaks today.. to the toilet.. to smoke.. to re-fill water.. blah blah blah.. partly oso trying to waste my time ba.. =p... thanx goodness not much nonsense frm my boss today.. else.. i think i will juz go home str8.. (kidding kidding...) how can i juz go home n quit.. haiz.. this is a lousy job.. but pay is damn good.. for the sake of the money.. i have to strive on.. woosh!!

tml not working.. but will still be a hectic day.. morning have to wash von.. then meet grandma for an early lunch.. afterwhich head dwn to far east for facial spa.. fix my heels.. then go hm change n prepare to go out with dear for his fren's concert at victoria concert hall... =)

k lah.. go back to work... eat snake long enuff le..

Strangely...

slpt for only 2 hrs and 15 mins.. i m damn awake... even in this cold weather...

leaving work early again.. going to dear's hse.. i m going to re-charge my beauty slp there.. hee...

hopefully my check can come in by today.. then i can bank in tml morning... soooo POOOORRRR~~~...

realised life is getting stranger by every moment.. the world is changing.. the environment is changing... pple ard u are changing.. i m changing... ok.. this is a very stupid statement.. but i m being very bored now.. so juz humor mi ya...

the reason that i have that thinking is beoz of my conversation with dear dear last nite.. =) tok about alot of stuff and of coz pple.. haiz... lots in mind.. oh well.. none of my biz anyway..

was hsekeeping my email.. this is one old email jessica sent mi.. still find them funny.. haha...

Q1) Ah Mei's dad has 7 wives. The 5th and 7th are Africans. Guess a Chinese idiom.
A1) Wu Qi Ma Hei

Q2) There's a party in the forest. Who didn't get to eat the cake!?!
A2) GRASS because Cao Mei Dan Gao

Q3) Ah bao was murdered! However, the police quickly found the killer. Who was it?
A3) Ah Dou because Dou Sha Bao

Q4) Xiao Bai and Da Bai are bros. As Xiao Bai grows older, he looks more and more like his bro. Guess a Chinese idiom.
A4) Zhen Xiang Da Bai

Q5) Osama, Bush , Blair and Saddam play mahjong. Who will win first ??
A5) Saddam Hussein because Saddam Hu Xian

Q6) What's the panda's 3 biggest wishes?
A6) i. Get rid of dark eyes ring
ii.Taking colour photo
iii. Wanna know whether he is bear or cat (xiong mao)?

Q7) Who will pick up the dumpling (ba zhang) on the floor ?
A7) Xiang Long because Xiang Long Shi Ba Zhang

Q8) There are 3 Male and 1 Female pencils in a box. The Female pencil got pregnant!! Which Male pencil is responsible?
A8) The one without the rubber

Q9) Xiao Ming drinks milk to grow up. What does Da Ming drink?
A9) Alcohol because Jiu Yang Da Ming

Q10) Which brand of shampoo is the wealthiest?
A10) "Lux" Super Rich

Q11) What did Batman say when he fell down?
A11) Painful Sia... (Bian fu sia)

Damn... argh... i m realli living in a freezer sia.. its already so damn cold already.. raining loh... this fat woman still go n lower the temperature.. say very hot.. kaoz!!!! yesterday oso like that.. the day before oso like that... kaozz.. i m working in a office in SINGAPORE.. not ALASKA!!!!kaozzzzz.... *brrrrrggggg*

a little tired today.. =)

hmm.. as mention in last blog.. took half day.. rushed to sch.. did a little chit chat with the administrator yest.. hope certain issues can be settle.. else really wasted..

had a long talk with baozhu n eileen at amk hub mos.. apparently.. alot of things have happened... not onli to them... but to mi as well.. so updates ard.. haha...

got eileen to gimmi a ride to dear's hse.. then tok abit at his void deck.. eileen mentioned about
night cycling together with ren, xian and weijie.. n ask dear along too.. i dun mind lah.. am sure dear dun mind too.. (which he realli doesn't.. coz i asked him.. haha..) but all the way to changi village leh!!! 5 hrs plus ride.. my leg sure gone case de loh... that day ECP already killing mi le... must start training up le...

eileen oso said that can go her hse for mahjong anytime... yay!!! can oso bring xy and grace along... yay yay!!! haha.. shiok! hee... happy...

oya.. Marigold's check is finally issue... sending to mi by mail.. hope to receive on fri.. happy...

dear dear oso made mi happy.. even i dun realli like the idea of him not telling mi he borrow the 100 frm his dad for mi.. but still.. thanx... will return ur dad as soon as the check banked in.. =) had quite a long talk abt frens ard mi with dear.. din quarrel at all.. he shared his views with mi.. =).. but sry dear.. have to go home at 2 plus am.. coz i sleepy sleepy le.. n sry i last nite blur blur.. called ur hse instead of hp.. love u...

felt alittle unjust this morning after reading someone blog.. and again.. my temper got over mi.. but i dun care already.. shall not bother over such matter anymore.. juz like i dun wan to bother over ade's issue anymore...

in office now.. although its lunch time.. but i m skipping lunch to earn the extra hour.. so eat abit snake now.. works boring.. but the money is good.. so.. work loh.. i need money for so many things.. my spects, my dental, my sch fees blah blah blah.. the list juz goes on and on.. calculated... i roughly need to earn 1.5k to settle dwn... y? coz my dental will be one of the most expensive item.. total shld be ard 1000 pluz.. again.. y? coz my lower wisdom needs surgery to extract out.. haiz.. 500 for one tooth.. and i got 2!!!! *faintz* not forgetting i still got the two upper ones.. money flies~~~~

talking abt money.. marigold still owes mi my pay.. knn.. 3 weeks le loh.. fucking hell still dun wan to pay.. i need money man!!!! argh...

ok.. today is dear off day.. but no choice kind of a busy today.. sorry.. =(.. coz i took half day off frm work.. meaning i m leaving at 2 pm.. which is soon.. rush dwn to sch to meet grace n settle some sch stuff.. then rush dwn to amk to meet eileen n baozhu.. then go pei dear for the rest of the nite.. then tml morning start work again.. haiz.. (btw.. alot of "then"s hor.. haha..)

anyway.. back to work.. *yawn*

Read his blog and msn this afternoon be4 i left for high tea with family..

Again.. pissed... u are contridicting wat u are saying... wad u shall care for mi.. wad u shall pamper mi but not to this extent... fuck you lah.. do u even noe wads the meaning of care n pamper? let mi explain to u...

CARE
–noun
1. a state of mind in which one is troubled; worry, anxiety, or concern: He was never free from care.
2. a cause or object of worry, anxiety, concern, etc.: Their son has always been a great care to them.
3. serious attention; solicitude; heed; caution: She devotes great care to her work.
4. protection; charge: He is under the care of a doctor.
5. temporary keeping, as for the benefit of or until claimed by the owner: He left his valuables in the care of friends. Address my mail in care of the American Embassy.
6. grief; suffering; sorrow.

–verb (used without object)
7. to be concerned or solicitous; have thought or regard.
8. to be concerned or have a special preference (usually used in negative constructions): I don't care if I do.
9. to make provision or look out (usually fol. by for): Will you care for the children while I am away?
10. to have an inclination, liking, fondness, or affection (usually fol. by for): Would you care for dessert? I don't care for him very much.

–verb (used with object)
11. to feel concern about: He doesn't care what others say.
12. to wish; desire; like: Would you care to dance?

PAMPER
–verb (used with object)
1. to treat or gratify with extreme or excessive indulgence, kindness, or care: to pamper a child; to pamper one's stomach.
2. To give in to; gratify: He pampered his ambition for wealth and fame.

if u care for mi.. really care for mi.. u would have know how n when to keep ur mouth shut when coming to these sort of issues... dun try or even bother to make urself sound so wei da le.. save it..

jer told mi this morning be4 i go hm.. that he had a headache everytime he had to bring mi back frm my point of breaking dwn n anger... seriously.. i had been trying so hard to control le.. so y do u have to let mi break loose? things almost got to a point of no return last nite... and apparently.. u have no remorse at all.. correct.. ur mouth is urs.. u can say wad u wan..but.. keep ur mouth away frm mi... and yes.. i hate u.. i m starting to hate u.. after all these times.. i duno wad to do already.. u urself said last nite that we dun understand u already.. mayb jer still can understand u.. but i dun already... communication with u seemed to b a issue btw u n mi already...

so.. plz stay out of my life already... at least for now.. i dun wan to give myself another opportunity to hear that name again...

thats all...

its 5.36am in the morning.. and yes.. i juz got home..

seriously.. i've been feeling very down this past week... over eCR, driving, working, money.. n juz 3 hrs ago.. i blew up..

everything went fine today.. perfect actually... dear came over my hse early after meeting his fren.. though he fell aslp.. then woke up and took mi out for dinner at mos.. took a slow long walk b4 and after our meals.. contented..

then.. went dwn to meet him.. was actually abit reluctant to go dwn meet him.. coz.. well... take it as i selfish.. but i wan to spent the rest of the day with dear on his off day.. but.. ok.. nvm.. went dwn still in the end... meet up.. i juz left the two of them to tok.. i seriously never tok much at all.. i juz sat dwn there.. drink.. play abit of psp.. stared into blank space.. n feeling bored..

finally got to walk abit.. tot can go home.. in the end walk to mccafe.. ok.. nvm.. then tummy pain.. but no one even bothered.. two of them still continued to tok.. ok.. nvm still.. then he juz have to open his mouth n mention the name that i never ever wan to hear again in my entire life until i die.. he of all pple shld noe this beta.. still can say this to mi.. "not toking to you... "

FUCK YOU!! i haven die yet ok..

not even a word of sorry.. nvm.. then u cannot keep ur mouth shut already meh? still continue to say.. "aiya. not toking to you..."

was so pissed off... i juz stomped off... after duno how long.. dear came.. feeling angry... in the end.. quarrelled over this stupid incident.. ok fine.. take it as that its my fault to feel angry.. but i dun have the rights to mah? juz cried all the way.. although in the end. everything turns out ok.. but.. haiz... this is taxing... this is draining too much frm mi...

seriously... warning to all pple out there who noes and dun noe wad happened.... do not... juz DO NOT mention these names (Jolin, Yizhen, Cindy) in front of mi.. for the last time... DO NOT EVER EVER EVER MENTION THEM... do not blame if i blew up at u or wad... i will cursed u till the very last of my breathe...